Mume Amenifanya Kama Dada Yake - Je Ni Dhwihaar? Afanye Nini Ikiwa Hawezi Kutimiza Kafara Ya Dhwihaar?

SWALI:

Alhamdulillah i got married in April and came to Europe to live with my husband and Alhamdulillah all went on well and then suddenly things started going wrong.

He is a very social person and he had contact with both the sexes and it kind of interfered with our marriage and we actually don't fight but we kind of have gone into silence with each other and i before Eid day i talked to him and told him we should forgive each other and try and sought out our marriage as these things are normal in marriages and he told me something which has kind of disturbed be as he said he is still giving us a try but he is looking at me as his sister, i know it is wrong what he has said but what is the status of our marriage now?

If he wishes to resume his marital status i know there is a penalty which he sas to pay either fast for 60 days continuous or feed 60 maskinis is there another way he can do it apart from these 2, kindly advise as i do not wish to go against Allaah.

JIBU:

Sifa zote njema Anastahiki Allaah Aliyetukuka Mola wa walimwengu wote, Swalah na salamu zimshukie kipenzi chetu Mtume Muhammad (Swalla Allaahu 'alayhi wa aalihi wa sallam) na Swahaba zake (Radhiya Allaahu 'anhum) na watangu wema mpaka Siku ya Mwisho.

Shukrani zetu za dhati kwa ndugu yetu kwa swali lako hilo kuhusu Dhwihaar. Allaah (Subhaanahu wa Ta'ala) Anatueleza kuhusu suala hilo katika Qur-aan na kafara yake pale Aliposema:

((قَدْ سَمِعَ اللَّهُ قَوْلَ الَّتِي تُجَادِلُكَ فِي زَوْجِهَا وَتَشْتَكِي إِلَى اللَّهِ وَاللَّهُ يَسْمَعُ تَحَاوُرَكُمَا إِنَّ اللَّهَ سَمِيعٌ بَصِيرٌ))  (( الَّذِينَ يُظَاهِرُونَ مِنكُم مِّن نِّسَائِهِم مَّا هُنَّ أُمَّهَاتِهِمْ إِنْ أُمَّهَاتُهُمْ إِلَّا اللَّائِي وَلَدْنَهُمْ وَإِنَّهُمْ لَيَقُولُونَ مُنكَرًا مِّنَ الْقَوْلِ وَزُورًا وَإِنَّ اللَّهَ لَعَفُوٌّ غَفُورٌ)) (( وَالَّذِينَ يُظَاهِرُونَ مِن نِّسَائِهِمْ ثُمَّ يَعُودُونَ لِمَا قَالُوا فَتَحْرِيرُ رَقَبَةٍ مِّن قَبْلِ أَن يَتَمَاسَّا ذَلِكُمْ تُوعَظُونَ بِهِ وَاللَّهُ بِمَا تَعْمَلُونَ خَبِيرٌ))   ((فَمَن لَّمْ يَجِدْ فَصِيَامُ شَهْرَيْنِ مُتَتَابِعَيْنِ مِن قَبْلِ أَن يَتَمَاسَّا فَمَن لَّمْ يَسْتَطِعْ فَإِطْعَامُ سِتِّينَ مِسْكِينًا ذَلِكَ لِتُؤْمِنُوا بِاللَّهِ وَرَسُولِهِ وَتِلْكَ حُدُودُ اللَّهِ وَلِلْكَافِرِينَ عَذَابٌ أَلِيمٌ))

((Allaah Amekwishasikia usemi wa mwanamke anaye jadiliana nawe juu ya mumewe, na anamshitakia Allaah. Na Allaah Anayasikia majibizano yenu. Hakika Allaah ni Mwenye kusikia, Mwenye kuona)) ((Wale miongoni mwenu wanaowatenga wake zao, hao si mama zao. Hawakuwa mama zao ila wale waliowazaa. Na hakika hao wanasema neno linalochusha, na la uongo. Na Allaah ni Mwenye kughufiria, Mwenye kusamehe)) ((Na wale wanaojitenga na wake zao, kisha wakarudia katika yale waliyoyasema, basi wamkomboe mtumwa kabla hawajagusana. Mnapewa maonyo kwa hayo. Na Allaah Anayajua yote mnayoyatenda)) ((Na asiyepata mtumwa kumkomboa, basi na afunge miezi miwili mfululizo kabla hawajagusana. Na asiyeweza hayo basi awalishe masikini sitini. Hayo ni hivyo ili mumuamini Allaah na Mtume Wake. Na hiyo ndiyo mipaka ya Allaah. Na kwa makafiri iko adhabu iumizayo)) [Al-Mujaadalah 58: 1 – 4).

Mwanamme yeyote yule amekatazwa na shari'ah ya Kiislamu kumuoa mama kwa hali yoyote ile. Na dada ni vile vile. Kwa kusema hivyo mumeo amekuwa ni haramu kwako mpaka alipe kafara.

Kafara yenyewe kabla ya yeye kukurudia tena wewe ni:

1.     Kuacha mtumwa huru au kutoa gharama yake. Akitoweza,

2.     Afunge miezi miwili mfululizo. Akitoweza hilo basi,

3.     Alishe masikini sitini.

Hili la tatu, ikiwa hana uwezo, hata wewe unaweza kumsaidia kulisha masikini sitini. Kwani imethibitika katika usimulizi na sababu ya kuteremshwa Aayah hizo ambazo zilimhusu Swahaabiyyah Khawlah bint Tha’labah ambaye alirudi kwa Mtume (Swalla Allaahu ‘alayhi wa ailihi wa sallam) kwa hoja zifuatazo:

  فَقَالَ لِي رَسُول اللَّه صَلَّى اللَّه عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ   ((مُرِيهِ فَلْيُعْتِقْ رَقَبَة))  قَالَتْ : فَقُلْت يَا رَسُول اللَّه مَا عِنْده مَا يُعْتِق قَالَ   ((فَلْيَصُمْ شَهْرَيْنِ مُتَتَابِعَيْنِ)) قَالَتْ : فَقُلْت وَاَللَّه إِنَّهُ لَشَيْخ كَبِير مَا لَهُ مِنْ صِيَام قَالَ ((فَلْيُطْعِمْ سِتِّينَ مِسْكِينًا وَسْقًا مِنْ تَمْر)) قَالَتْ : فَقُلْت يَا رَسُول اللَّه مَا ذَاكَ عِنْده قَالَتْ : فَقَالَ رَسُول اللَّه صَلَّى اللَّه عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ ((فَإِنَّا سَنُعِينُهُ بِفَرَقٍ مِنْ تَمْر)) قَالَتْ : فَقُلْت يَا رَسُول اللَّه وَأَنَا سَأُعِينُهُ بِفَرَقٍ آخَر قَالَ ((قَدْ أَصَبْت وَأَحْسَنْت فَاذْهَبِي فَتَصَدَّقِي بِهِ عَنْهُ ثُمَّ اِسْتَوْصِي بِابْنِ عَمّك خَيْرًا)) قَالَتْ : فَفَعَلْت . وَرَوَاهُ أَبُو دَاوُد فِي كِتَاب الطَّلَاق

Akaniambia Mtume (Swalla Allaahu ‘alayhi wa alihi wa sallam): ((Muamrishe aache huru Mtumwa)). Akajibu Khawlah: “Ee Mjumbe wa Allaah, hana uwezo wa kuacha huru” Akasema Mtume (Swalla Allaahu ‘alayhi wa alihi wa sallam): ((Basi afunge miezi miwili mfululizo)): Akajibu: “Naapa kwa Allaah, yeye ni mkongwe na hawezi kufunga”. Akasema: ((Basi alishe masikini sitini *wasq ya tende)). Akasema: “Ee Mjumbe wa Allaah, hana uwezo”. Akasema: ((Tutamsaidia kikapu cha tende)) Akasema: “Ee Mjumbe wa Allaah, nami nitamsadia kwa [kikapu] kingine”. Akasema: ((Umefanya kitendo chema, hivyo nenda ukagawe tende kwa ajili yake na mhudumie binamu yako)) Akasema: “Nikatekeleza” [Abu Daawuud katika Kitabut-Twalaaq]

* Wasq moja ni sawa na kipimo cha mzigo mmoja wa kumtwisha ngamia au sawa na Sa’a 60 kama wanavyoeleza baadhi ya wafafanuzi, na Sa’a ni kama kilo mbili na nusu.

Tanbihi: Ingawa maelezo katika Hadiyth hiyo imetaja tende, lakini kafara hii inaweza kutimizwa kwa kulisha chakula chochote kile ambacho kiwe na thamani ya usawa na chakula anachokula mtu binafsi. Hii ni kama ilivyo kafara ya kiapo:

((لاَ يُؤَاخِذُكُمُ اللّهُ بِاللَّغْوِ فِي أَيْمَانِكُمْ وَلَكِن يُؤَاخِذُكُم بِمَا عَقَّدتُّمُ الأَيْمَانَ فَكَفَّارَتُهُ إِطْعَامُ عَشَرَةِ مَسَاكِينَ مِنْ أَوْسَطِ مَا تُطْعِمُونَ أَهْلِيكُمْ أَوْ كِسْوَتُهُمْ أَوْ تَحْرِيرُ رَقَبَةٍ فَمَن لَّمْ يَجِدْ فَصِيَامُ ثَلاَثَةِ أَيَّامٍ ذَلِكَ كَفَّارَةُ أَيْمَانِكُمْ إِذَا حَلَفْتُمْ وَاحْفَظُواْ أَيْمَانَكُمْ كَذَلِكَ يُبَيِّنُ اللّهُ لَكُمْ آيَاتِهِ لَعَلَّكُمْ تَشْكُرُونَ))

((Allaah Hatakushikeni kwa viapo vyenu vya upuuzi, lakini Atakushikeni kwa mnavoapa kweli kweli kwa makusudio. Basi kafara yake ni kuwalisha masikini kumi kwa chakula cha wastani mnachowalisha ahali zenu, au kuwavisha, au kumkomboa mtumwa. Asiyepata hayo, basi afunge siku tatu. Hii ndiyo kafara ya viapo vyenu mnapoapa. Na hifadhini yamini zenu. Namna hivyo Alllaah Anakubainishieni Aya zake ili mpate kushukuru)) [Al-Maaidah: 89]

Kwa hiyo ikiwa nawe huna uwezo wa kumsaidia basi mnaweza kupata usaidizi kutoka sehemu nyingine. Mbali na njia hizo sheria haijaweka nyingine yoyote ile.

Na Allaah Anajua zaidi