Mume Anayependa Rafiki Zaidi Kuliko Familia Yake? Afanyeje Mke Ikiwa Mume Haachi Tabia Hiyo?
SWALI LA
ASSALAMU'ALAIKUM
My question involves a friend of mine. Her husband is a man of friends, He gets of work and directly heads over to his buddies to hang around, he has a wife and a 2 kids at home, this is an everyday thing by the way, his wife starts to get mad because it doesnt only happen on weekdays but also on weekends. His biggest excuse will be I am working Monday to Friday so on the weekend I want to relax with my friends. Is this really a good thing? is it a good sign? What should she be doing to let him avoid all this?
SWALI LA PILI
AsalamuAlaikum
Swali langu Nii bibi afanye nini ikiwa mume wake anapenda marafiki ya
JIBU:
Sifa zote njema Anastahiki Allaah Aliyetukuka Mola Mlezi wa walimwengu wote, Swalah na salamu zimshukie kipenzi chetu Mtume Muhammad (Swalla Allaahu ‘alayhi wa aalihi wa sallam) na Swahaba zake (Radhiya Allaahu ‘anhum) na watangu wema mpaka Siku ya Mwisho.
Shukrani zetu za dhati kwa maswali hayo ya mume kupenda marafiki zaidi kuliko mke.
Mara nyingi ima wazazi wa msichana au msichana mwenyewe hufanya makosa ambayo yatamfanya maisha yake yote asiwe na raha. Tatizo hili kwa wanandoa linawapata zaidi wanawake kwa sababu kubwa nayo ni kutotaka kufuata maagizo aliyoyaacha Allaah Aliyetukuka na Mtume Wake (Swalla Allaahu ‘alayhi wa aalihi wa sallam). Makosa hayo yanamuingiza katika shimo ambalo baadaye
Hakika ni kuwa jambo
Ukweli ni kuwa si haki kwa mume anapotoka kazini au siku za Jumamosi na Jumapili kuwa na marafiki zaidi wawe ni Waislamu au si Waislamu kuliko mke. Mke ni mshiriki wa mume katika maisha hivyo yeye na watoto wanatakiwa watangulizwe katika urafiki na ushirika. Salmaan (Radhiya Allaahu ‘anhu) alimwambia nduguye (Abu ad-Dardaa’ (Radhiya Allaahu ‘anhu): “Hakika Mola wako Mlezi ana haki juu yako; nafsi yako ina haki juu yako; mke wako ana haki juu yako; mpe kila mmoja haki yake”. Walikuja kwa Mtume (Swalla Allaahu ‘alayhi wa aalihi wa sallam) wakamtajia hayo, naye (Swalla Allaahu ‘alayhi wa aalihi wa sallam) akasema: “Salmaan amesema kweli” (al-Bukhaariy na at-Tirmidhiy).
Mbali na hayo marafiki wana haki
Yale ambayo tunaweza kukupatia nasaha kwayo ni:
1. Mwanzo kabisa mwambie rafiki yako ajaribu kuzungumza na mumewe kwa wakati unaofaa na kwa njia nzuri kwa busara bila tuhma, kejeli wala ukali. Hii ndio njia ya kwanza ambayo Qur-aan imetutaka tufanye. Na mke anajua vizuri wakati na sehemu ya kumfanya mumewe amsikilize.
2. Ikiwa itashindikana, bado amekataa kukusikiliza basi inabidi uitishe kikao cha kupata suluhu baina yako, mumeo, wazazi wako (au wawakilishi wako) na wazazi wa mume wake (wawakilishi wake). Ikiwa kweli mnataka suluhu basi itapatikana na mtaishi katika hali nzuri baada ya hapo.
3. Ikiwa hakukupatikana ufumbuzi basi itabidi uende kwa Qaadhi ikiwa yupo Qaadhi hapo unapoishi. Lau hatakuwepo basi itabidi uende kwa Shaykh anayejulikana, mcha Mungu na muadilifu ili aisikilize kesi yenu hiyo ya awatolee uamuzi muafaka juu ya tatizo
Tunawaombea dada zetu wote wenye matatizo katika ndoa zao Allaah Aliyetukuka Awatatulie. Na pia bado tunawanasihi dada zetu wachukue hadhari za ziada baada ya posa na kabla kuingia katika unyumba.
Na Allaah Anajua zaidi